On the fourteenth day of Christmas...
...I socialised like the human adult I'm not.
24 days of Christmas
Each day of Christmas, I'll be reviewing a Christmas movie and sharing a new Christmas outfit. Today's tee expresses my love for social situations (guys, I love you dearly, but pants!). Unfortunately, it's going to be upwards of 40 degrees Celsius this coming week, so I won't be able to make this a fixture of my wardrobe.
As promised, I also have another gem of an Aussie Christmas carol for you. Please do not judge me by the weirdness of my country. I promise we're the good kind of weird.
On this, the fourteenth day of Christmas, I'm back on Hallmark movies.
Christmas Incorporated - 3.5/5 glittery tree topper stars
Tee hee, so this one's another Hallmark movie. My bad. I can't remember if I knew this or not. But I'd heard it was awesome so I had to watch it. And, it wasn't too bad really. I had some issues with it - because I'm getting mighty picky and demanding of my Christmas movies now.
This movie opens with Riley Vance (played by Shenae Grimes-Beech - I've never heard of her before, but it seems polite to put their names in. Plus she reminded me of Anna Kendrick and we all know how much I love her) looking for a new job. At first, she's unhirable because she doesn't already have a job - in some weird-arse movie logic that probably happens far too often in real life for comfort. Then she hasn't got the right experience - fair enough in my opinion. Then, she gets the job but only because she's the wrong Riley V. Now, we don't just have a boss-PA relationship being set-up here, but also a mistaken identity romance. I was going to get down for this.
Meeting our male lead in William Young (played by Steve Lund) was a touch confusing. He was good-looking enough to be a bit of a jerk. But he wasn't really. Did he have a chip on his shoulder? Something to prove? Was he just a Grinch? They set all these things up, but as a character he didn't act like he had these back stories. He was nice enough, he laughed, he smiled, he was incredibly polite and didn't bustle into interactions all overly arrogant and expectant. Which made him a really weird romance lead. On one hand, it felt like the movie was lacking with none of these major tropes. On the other, it made for a super productive and conducive to setting up the sweet romance. I was just so confused about whether I like it or not.
There was a mean reporter because, a town full of overly friendly people who had the introvert in me shrinking in terror, and a toy factory. It all came together with all the cliché you want in a Hallmark movie - all my predictions came true and, instead of feeling annoyingly unsurprised, I felt quite satisfied. I think this is one of those films where I would have been quite sad if they'd suddenly veered off-script and given me some originality. It might have been my mood, it might have been that, by the end, my Christmas movie expecations had lowered again. But whatever the reason, I was happy with it.
So I give this one 3.5/5 glittery tree topper stars. It was good. It left me feeling warm and fuzzy and I really enjoyed watching it. But I'm not going to run out and watch it again straight away. It had everything I wanted in a Hallmark Christmas movie with the romance and the small town and the decorations - SOOO many decorations, I was truly jealous. It was sweet and heartwarming, and quite a nice bit of Holiday escapism.
If you've got a suggestion for a movie, leave it in the comments. You'll find the play-by-play below the trailer.
You can check out the (best I could find) trailer below (fingers crossed there isn't any regional bollocks that gets in the way).
Christmas Incorporated brain vomit:
Yay Hallmark!
What a bitch.
He wasn't quite so bad.
Who is William Young?
Now that's Christmas decorating!! That's Christmas dressing. Good dedication, people.
What a positive young woman - there's no way he's going to be a grumpy Darcy-type
Okay, so he's not a Darcy, he's a douche. Brilliant.
Insufferable Christmas cheer? So he's Scrooge McDouche? (As opposed to Scrooge McDuck... get it?)
Everyone is too friendly. Like not too much for a Hallmark movie. But too much for my introverted arse.
That is an appropriate amount of garland.
Haha jail. Ain't no one cares about your fancy credentials here, boy. Except the mayor, he's right up William's arse.
Who doesn't like Christmas? 😱😱
Bedroom?? It seems awfully early in the relationship, Hallmark. Usually we barely get a kiss and now it's "where's the bedroom?"
Oh noes! Now he has a bad reputation and she's going to have to fix it and then they'll fall in love and it's gonna be all kinds of naw.
That reporter chick already annoys me.
It's not a toy factory without red coats with blue pockets.
But why is not everyone wearing coats and not everyone wearing hard hats? That seems quite random…
Too traditional. Rude.
Oh, but he smiles. So he can't be too Scroogey. Or is he not smiling at nostalgia but at her? Oh, he already likes her. Duh.
Market bears to adults...I personally get it - I love teddies - but normal adults??
Christmas re-brand? I am down for that.
No! Piper already has a million jobs. Don't give her another one...and an unpaid one at that.
Oh, they need a Christmas miracle? What a coinkydink.
Bahaha - he looks like he's about to throw up with all the Christmas he's surrounded by.
😱😱😱 Magic Santa???
Now there's ice skating! It's not a Christmas movie without ice skating. Makes it hard to have an authentic Australian Christmas movie.
And of course she can't really skate so he has to hold her hands 😍
I'll say this, his character is...hard to pin down. He hasn't got any tropes except hating Christmas and I feel like that's making this movie super lacking but also super productive and [word that means me-likey] for the romance angle. Also conducive for the romance angle. At best, he's got a chip on his shoulder and something to live up to, but he doesn't act like it - no real superiority complex, he's not aloof and grumpy, he smiles. I'm...I'm just so confused.
So she's like Hallmark Anna Kendrick! That's who she looks like.
And he cooks.
Creamy mushroom soup, chicken and ritz crackers. This could go in so many directions…
Chicken on the ritz… I could be for that.
And bonding over dinner. Cute.
Rofl - she's not wrong. Oh and he's all flustered now. That's kinda cute.
Wow, these two are already super into each other.
Oh, no. The reporter again!!
No man cooks for a woman without an ulterior motive - lols. I don't think anyone cooks for anyone without an ulterior motive.
He's doing cute things for her.
Naw, the heart is definitely involved. That is quite cute.
Who doesn't know what a secret santa is?!? Madness. Does he live under a rock?
Is she wearing the same clothes again? Or has it been a really long day?
OMG - kiss already!! 😘😘😘
Are you trying to be punny 😂😂😂
Oh, no. She's found out that Riley isn't Riley but is Riley. This won't backfire at all.
It would not be professional, but when you find out that Riley is the wrong Riley V then she'll be fired and you'll help her start a business and then you'll get married and have all the children.
Santa totally just butted in the end of his story!
Also, does this Santa just live in his Santa suit all December? Or is he magic? Can he be magic?
Oh, smooth William. Did she leave someone behind? Rofl.
Hubby says his tree looks like it's been wrapped in toilet paper and hers looks pretty good. I agree. His looks boring and bare. Hers looks like a homely Christmas tree.
Inviting him home for Christmas? That isn't cliched and obvious at all. Well played.
Not sales!
Stupid reporter lady. Double stupid reporter lady. What is your problem?? Why are you such a bitter shithead?
Ah the typical "I never lied about who I was" line.
Haha - suck it reporter lady.
Yeah, don't let it slip away, William. Don't be an idiot.
Love how people in small towns always just insert themselves into other people's lives.
Then go to her!
We still have to work out why sales randomly stalled…
I've seen my future - Christmas jerseys everyday and garland EVERYWHERE
Did he...did he just say the same thing like eight hundred times in different ways?
Nailed it!! But what exactly is she consulting on…?
And of course she magically fixes cars off screen.
Secret talents? Have to wait and see? That has to be a sex thing.
Children's hospital. Of course. See? Sweetie.
KISS. ALREADY. KISS!!! Sheesh.
Naw, she did it. She made the move.
"I don't quite have everything. I don't have you." Cliched and still so good.
3.5/5 glittery tree topper stars - it was good, left me feeling warm and fuzzy and I really enjoyed watching it. But I'm not going to run out and watch it again straight away. It was all I wanted in a Hallmark Christmas movie with the romance and the small town and the decorations. It was sweet and heartwarming and a nice bit of Holiday escapism.
